The Straw That Broke

brevity, depression, jealousy, petite pen

A petite pen request for 30 words or less to artwork by Malcolm T. Liepke. If you feel inspired by the misery and ecstasy captured in this painting, raise your pen, and share your brutal brevity. If you post a response, please be sure to ping me back so I don’t miss it.

Happy Saturday!

The Straw That Broke

Poke my eyes out.
Crush my head.
Rejection is oppressive,
a camel crossing desert,
whipped, but never fed.
I hear lips smack, but
he don’t care if I drop dead.

Cover Art: Malcolm T. Liepke “All Alone”

30 responses to “The Straw That Broke”

Jeff Flesch

An awesome and painful write, K. Here’s mine.

Feelings arise in
Places I’ve never been
As mind takes in
Sensitivity, the flowers grim
Smiling from the wind
While Head and heart
Explore the soul within

It’s always so much fun to do these with you, when something comes up. Lovely. Happy weekend, K. 💜

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1. K.Hartless
  
  I love the opening of this. Thank you for writing with me, Jeff. The perfect petite pen as it offers a sense of hope. Hope you’re having a fun weekend! 💜🦋
  
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  1. Jeff Flesch
    
    You’re most welcome, K. It’s always such a joy to write with you. So much fun. Weekend is wonderful, thank you, I hope yours is too! 🦋💜
    
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  2. K.Hartless
    
    💜 so far, so brilliant. Your poem only made it better.
    
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  3. Jeff Flesch
    
    🦋💜
    
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John

I love how your words flow with the image. Poor guy on the left, been there! Have a great weekend, K.

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1. K.Hartless
  
  Thank you, John. It’s not a completely unfamiliar scene for me as well. I appreciate your kind comment.
  
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  1. John
    
    ❤️
    
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Tom

Very poignant contrasts in one picture. Beautiful accompanying verses, K! ❤

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1. K.Hartless
  
  Thank you. 💜I thought it’d be a subtle twist for him to be brooding over the guy, and the camel imagery, buried somewhere in the subconscious, I suppose.
  
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  1. Tom
    
    It’s a wonderful piece – beautifully described! 🙂
    
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Mister Bump UK

Oh, dear

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1. K.Hartless
  
  Is that your brevity response? 😂
  
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  1. Mister Bump UK
    
    Just speechless
    
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  2. K.Hartless
    
    Amazing. Don’t think I’ve ever seen you that way.
    
    LikeLiked by 1 person
  3. Mister Bump UK
    
    🤐
    
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Little Charmer

Brutal. But brilliantly so 🖤🖤

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1. K.Hartless
  
  Thank you. 💜
  
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  1. Little Charmer
    
    You’re welcome my friend 🖤
    
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Jaya Avendel

I loved this emotional, crisp read that is alive with raw brevity!

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1. K.Hartless
  
  Thank you for the kind comments, Jay. Brevity brings out the star flavors from what could have been a word buffet.
  
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johnlmalone

I couldn’t better this: you’ve nailed it: savage, vitriolic, splenetic — and those last two lines !!!

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yourplateormine967244485

Thank you for the prompt/inspiration and well done on your poem! My attempt is posted on my blog: Yourplateormine.967244485.Wordpress.com titled: Came Together. I apologize if I should have posted on this page. 😌💗

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1. K.Hartless
  
  Oh wonderful. I’m headed over to read this with my coffee. So glad you felt compelled to pen something to this painting. 💜
  
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yourplateormine967244485

I loved the camel line too!! 💜

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Just a sip. – Writing Whatnots

[…] this to K. Hartless’s Yardsale of Thoughts (https://khartless.com/2022/05/14/the-straw-that-broke/) and her invitation to write a petite pen in response to this wonderful […]

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1. K.Hartless
  
  Yay! What a treat to see what your talented pen cooks up.
  
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writingwhatnots

I too have joined in the fun. (I posted it ‘cos I love the painting – https://writingwhatnotsblog.wordpress.com/2022/05/15/just-a-sip/).

Love your language in this – so much packed into so little. I feel his pain.

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1. K.Hartless
  
  Thank you so much for joining in, Marion. Yay to brevity! 💜
  
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Lance Dean

Reminds me of Gwendolyn Brooks.

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