Each day, I ascend the porcelain throne,

underneath a bamboo towel baldachin,

adorned with scrubs and apricot lotion,

at last I am alone.

And from this dais,

I am the monarch of the entire

tiled floor kingdom.

On my elongated seat,

double-flush system underneath,

I can sense the power behind the throne.

The fanfare of royalty when I reach for

a piece of my toilet paper escutcheon,

with a slow-close lid,

in this poise,

nothing goes to waste.

©2024 | K.F. Hartless


Prompt: Craft an ode. Take inspiration from Pablo Neruda, the Chilean-born poet and Nobel Prize Winner. While he is most famous in the English-speaking world for his collection Twenty Love Poems and a Song of Despair, he also wrote more than two hundred odes, and had a penchant for writing sometimes-long poems of appreciation for very common or mundane things. You can read English translations of “Ode to the Dictionary” at the bottom of this page, “Ode to My Socks” here, and “Ode to a Large Tuna in the Market” here.

21 responses to “Ode to My Commode”

  1. funny

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, Beth.

      Like

  2. nicely done & thanks for a good laugh

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for reading and commenting on this one. I’m so glad you enjoyed it.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I love it! And, slow-closing lids too. 🤭

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Why thank you, John. Here’s to ascending whatever thrones life puts in our way. 💜😂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Cheers! 😂🍻

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Ha. Love the illustraiton of your porcelain throne as well.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Judy. I’ve spent quite a lot of time on the throne already.

      Like

      1. Haven’t we all? Age creates certain necessities.

        Like

  5. This must be a FIRST: an ode to the commode, Brilliant and daring — I had to look up ‘baldachin’ and ‘escutcheon’; the most interesting piece I’ve read all week !!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. What an honor. Thank you, John. I’ll be sure not to flush this one away.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. hahahahahahahahahhahahahhahhahhaahhaahhahahjhajhhahahahahhjjhhnh

        Liked by 1 person

      2. 😊

        Liked by 1 person

  6. LOL, just noticed the pun in the last line 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I was attempting one of your twists. Well, you have to start somewhere. 🤣

      Liked by 2 people

  7. Thanks for the laugh this morning! 😂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You’re most welcome, Tiff. I think with more sit time, I could really perfect this one. 🤣

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Bob Avatar

    Haha! Wonderful.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, Bob. Once I had the title, it had to be done.

      Liked by 1 person

  9. I LOVE THIS. LOL

    Liked by 1 person

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